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One Side: One Friend's Perspective

Sometimes I'm recorded while having a meal. I’ll see myself on her Instagram – it’s like a sudden shock.

My best friend of a decade, Marielle, calls herself the “creativity monarch”. It’s fun for a bit, but it weighs on our friendship.

Being highly outgoing, there's a constant urge the need to record everything all the time. During meals out, she says, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which makes me cringe. I don’t like it when other people see her performing for the camera – I get vicarious awkwardness. Another annoyance is because meals lose their warmth.

She isn’t exactly an influencer yet, but Marielle is aspiring to become one. She makes video blogs about living in our city, a day in her life, and her styling career. The material is quality, I’ll give her that, but I don’t want to be involved. Sometimes she films me while I’m eating, or just accompanying her. Later, I appear on her Instagram afterwards, and it comes like a jumpscare: I’ll have no makeup on, an awkward face or photographed while eating. It feels invasive.

Marielle also expects me to film her at inconvenient times. Sometimes I'm in conversation to someone else, or we're simply hanging out in the street. The dynamic feels like our bond has turned into me being her unpaid videographer. She has the means to hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. Upon mentioning my discomfort about this arrangement, she brushed it off. She’s taken me to a couple of industry functions, which was nice, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I invest assisting her make content.

I’m grateful that she has supported me with my design career, but I don’t want our friendship to become just a ledger of exchanges. I don't believe she's insincere or dishonest, but at times it seems that if recording starts, we will begin acting in a way that presents a favorable image for her channel.

She will say, “OK, look happy!” and record me smiling with another. It’s so silly. It's crucial her to recognize that our 10-year friendship still has limits. I enjoy being with her, but I also want to experience it without being filmed, edited, or shared for an viewers. I am not a prop for her Instagram.

The Other Side: The Content Creator's View

I hope Beth to see that the creations we make together can get us an opportunity.

I love shooting content. It's more than a pastime; it's integral to who I am. Creating videos and documenting experiences online allows me to show my personality and connect with people in new ways.

I wouldn't label myself as a professional creator yet, but it's savvy to generate income from your interests. I look up to people on social platforms who pull off that style of casual, DIY content creation.

Content creation is my interpretation of living actively: observing the details, posting them with an viewership that values the art behind it. I never intend to make Beth uncomfortable. Bringing her to professional gatherings was my way of sharing opportunities, providing her a chance to experience exclusive moments that could help her professional path too. That’s not leverage, it's simply being realistic.

I’d still take her to such functions even if she refused to assist me, but I desire her to see what the work we make together can achieve: an opening. I understand not all people enjoys being on camera, but sometimes spontaneity is what makes content genuine. Being recorded occasionally is an inherent aspect of being my companion. I'd remove anything she asked, but she hasn't made such a request yet.

I don’t expect anybody to be my personal videographer, but friends help each other in small ways. I thought recording a short video here or there would be fun for her. Creativity thrives in partnership, and having my friend around makes endeavors lively and pleasurable. I don't compel her to take part in anything, and I’d never intentionally embarrass her. But creating content jointly occasionally is part of how I document our shared experiences.

I value our friendship deeply and don’t want making videos to drive a wedge between us. I am ready to find middle ground: like requesting permission before filming, and avoiding shots that might make her uncomfortable.

This isn’t about power, it’s about expressing my perspective while still considering hers. Clearly content creation is not a substitute for real connection: it's merely part of how I live my life and I want her to be included in a way that’s enjoyable for each of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Is it right for her to stop filming herself and Beth when they are out together?

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than having a companion point a camera at you. I understand that it’s Marielle’s job, but I don’t make friends come to my workplace. Maybe she can find influencer friends to create content with. With the dark, looming future of AI, human connections are the only thing we have – cherish them!
Liberty, 25

If you’re doing something professionally, it's unfair to expect your friends for help every time, even if they have done it before. While she enjoys shooting, that doesn't imply all those around her is willing material. She must to honor her friend's privacy.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love making content and showing off her life publicly, but it’s not for everyone. It’s nice she has helped her friend professionally, but she must to listen to what Beth wants.
Emma, 27

It sounds like you care about each other, so cling to that and make sure it’s the priority in your relationship. Create some real memories, where genuine feelings are stored, not online archives. Even public figures who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
Sarah, 53

Marielle appears to be not fully engaged nor authentic when she’s with Beth – she’s working. Each appears confused as to where the line is. The solution lies not in trying to alter one another, but in each setting clear limits around what feels acceptable to them and seeing if there is an mutually agreeable middle ground.
Barbara, 71

Now You Be the Judge

Consider this question: is Marielle exploiting their friendship?